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Excerpt for my latest poem – The Niffirgs & Their Honyacks

Read the full poem on my Patreon.

Sometimes, I miss the nightmares I had as a kid. I miss the moving shadows and strange creaks I would hear just before my eyes closed. I miss waiting up for the monsters to actually materialize. As an adult, as a Mother, my bedtime fears have evolved into scarier visions. They are scarier because they are real.

I haven’t been sleeping well. Sure, I have made huge strides in my life recently with the move to the PNW. I’m writing and spending more time with my family. I especially love the writing part. However, that means I am in my head more. When I am lying in bed and everyone is asleep that’s when the real monsters crawl into my space. You know what’s been keeping me awake lately? It’s the “Lynch Moms”, their kids and the fact the plague seems to be returning.

Was I the only one naming these evil bitches after the “Lynch Mom’s” I knew?

Them – Prime

Ok, now let me define “Lynch Moms” for you. It is a term I came up with for the worst-of-the-worst mothers in Rancho Cucamonga, SoCal. Now, a term I use to describe the parents out there fucking with the health of other people’s children and their families. These were the superficial and you guessed it, white privileged moms who lived to insert themselves into every conflict their children faced. Sounds harmless until you realize these women demanded blood from a child and that child’s family. They would humiliate and then alienate entire families if their own child was affected by a school confrontation. They would do it even when their child wasn’t involved. While there are situations that warrant such behavior – let’s say if a pedophile moved into the neighborhood – these women would create drama when their kids would simply tell them how their day at school was. They were bored, lonely and entitled.

Lynch Mom’s Have existed as long as Suburbs have.

It’s the “Lynch Moms” and their offspring that create the fears I am trying to absorb and digest to ease the anxiety for my kids who will be attending new schools, in a new state and a completely new world. My kids are not unique to this situation. Children are forced to move to other states all the time, but now there is the anxiety of attending school in-person, during a pandemic. This is a new kind of fear I don’t think any parent or child is prepared for. However, there are things that really don’t need to be of any concern. For instance, making sure your kid stays masked if they are attending school in-person vaccinated or not. Especially if they are not. Even without a highly contagious, infectious mutated disease like the Delta Variant, kids are fucking gross. Masks should have always been an option.

Before I go on, let’s get one thing straight. It’s not that I am afraid of the “Lynch Moms” usual bullshittery. I am far from afraid of them. What unnerves me is the fact that they are now encouraging their mini hellions to defy mask mandates. That basically means making life even harder for their peers and teachers after an already difficult 16 months.

These are the same twats who had hissy fits during the National School Walkout in 2018. Do you remember that? The walk-out was encouraged across the country by the surviving students. It was scheduled for 17 minutes to honor each life lost, a moment of silence. Yet these ignorant Beasties were pissed their students were subjected to such protests. They felt children were not mature enough to protest or walk-out of school. They felt the walk-out was encouraging kids to ditch school. Seriously. They let it all out on Facebook. I wonder if their kids are smart enough to think about it – their parents prefer they be obedient, sitting ducks, for a classroom shooting. Instead encouraging them to become harbingers of illness by encouraging them to spread an aggressive disease by walking-out if they are forced to wear masks in class. I wonder if they consider that their parents are sadists or wanna-be Abrahams. My kids have had enough experience with these “Lynch Moms” and their kids, to know how to co-exist with them. It still infuriates me because they shouldn’t have to deal with this at all! Isn’t there enough shit our kids have to deal with? This hissy fit in opposition to an effective safety measure is the lowest the “Countrywide Lynch Moms” have gone by far!

At the rate these bitches are complaining about masks being worn at school, all kids will be back to full-time distance learning within weeks of school beginning. Even worse, it’s even deadlier than the variant. The “Lynch Mom’s” kids mimic their parents’ behavior. Especially the entitled kids, who know their parents will take to Facebook, school board meetings and seek to destroy anyone who stands in their way.

The Plague Has Returned

Ok, we have all seen enough zombie films to know the basics about how infectious diseases work. The disease mutates, it evolves – similar to the way we do. We know that this will happen when we don’t do what’s needed to eradicate the problem in enough time. Hence, the Delta variant. It was already gross enough when one of my kids would bring home some bug they got from their classmates and infect the entire family. It was already bad enough that many of the “Lynch Moms” would send their kids to school with bellies full of motrin to disguise a fever just so their brat would get that perfect attendance award. Now, these women are using excuses like, ” Our children’s smiles need to be seen more than ever.” as a reason to disrupt the school year planning meetings. They have been recorded saying, “masks are muzzles that affect our children’s mental health.” Yet, their children had reputations of being violent bullies since as early as first grade.

The Good Son-1993

We live in a real life horror movie.

Between the plague, the rabid zombies and their spitting kids, climate change and civil unrest, it’s no wonder why the monsters are having a ball in my head. Usually, I would look forward to mingling with the Halloween and Horror Community to forget my troubles, but even that is becoming challenging. Again, I was certain I would be at Midsummer Scream’s Awaken The Spirits show on August 14th and 15th. I had planned on it since it was announced. Rooms were booked, VIP tickets were bought, I was making plans, my dear readers. Then I saw the first few breakthrough cases emerge here in the PNW. Then the number of cases everywhere began to rapidly rise. I love Midsummer Scream events, I truly do but, I can’t endure a 32 hour round-trip drive for that kind of risk. It’s indoors and a lot of people are going. A lot of people who know they don’t have to show proof of vaccination or a negative COVID test. A lot of people have trouble keeping their masks on and flaunt it at other indoor “Spooky” and Horror events. I am fully vaccinated and I like the added protection I feel wearing masks. I also know what triggers my panic attacks. I can’t imagine attending a show, seeing friends, meeting new people, seeing outside friends, and family, all while possibly being a carrier of the variant myself. I can’t imagine becoming sick and trying to drive home. I’m not ready to spend that much time around crowds of that magnitude while indoors. It was a very hard choice to make, I may even regret it, but I have decided not to attend Midsummer Scream’s Awaken The Spirit event. I. am. just. not. ready.

I truly want this to be an event to remember for all those who attend. I hope it’s well received and respected as much as the recent Witches Brew Night two night event. I hope that those who attend respect the mask mandate in place so that the work of the producers, volunteers and vendors’ hard work isn’t in vain. I will try to return to SoCal in October. I just hope things improve and people do right by each other. It’s no lie that the unvaccinated are ones who are accounting for hospitalizations and deaths. Mask mandates are more to protect the unvaccinated, the most vulnerable to the Delta Variant.

“No one tells you when you become a parent that you are condemned to worry for the rest of your life.” – Anxiety, The Poetry Pharmacy Calm App.

I am taking things one month at a time at this point. Taking the lead right now is helping my kids think more positively about their upcoming new beginning. It’s no easy feat. I see my angsty Goth teen-self in my kids. Talking with them and supporting that their worries are valid will help them get through the unknown together as a family.. That helps ease their mind’s – even if it’s just for that one moment of worry they may be experiencing. Despite my own struggles with depression and anxiety, I always seem to pull myself together when it comes to my kids. Wanna know my secret?

I gather my strength for and from them.

Make no mistake, I am continuing to explore and partake within in-person happenings closer to home. I am looking around for Halloween goods, attending the Vancouver Farmer’s Market weekly and swimming in rivers. I plan to return to the Coffin Club’s dance floor soon. If things improve and/or there are safety mandates that I am comfortable with, I will be seeing She Past Away, ACTORS and Twin Tribes live shows in September. The thing is, I don’t have to spend 32 hours, round-trip, in a car just to find I can’t handle a large scale indoor event. If a happening is too much to endure closer to home or I don’t feel like it’s a safe place to be, I can turn around, leave and go home within minutes. I actually do that quite often when I venture out. The pandemic has taught me to slow down, take my time and think things through before making a decision about something. I acknowledge that is a privilege not all have. I don’t think I’d be this way if I was still in LA. It’s good to be awake and embracing the present. Though, at times, the uncertainty of even the near future is frightening and that reality of it all hurts like hell, but I’m glad I took the red pill.

Fearing for children is far scarier than the strange noises you hear in the house at night. When I invite my childhood nightmares to return, I often fall backwards in time and visit some dusty childhood memories. I lived through some scary situations in my youth. I like to visualize myself sending messages to younger me. I believe I have accomplished this and it’s my inner child that drives me to rally enough positivity to share with my kids. Of corpse, it’s not always as simple as it seems. It just feels good to know that I have an endless flow of maternal energy to keep fighting for my kids. When my thoughts of releasing my kids into the maw of in-person school, in this new and pandemic ridden America, I lie frozen in bed. Sometimes tears stream down my eyes and I sweat from the terror that only my mind can create. Every time, out of nowhere, something shifts and my visions shift and the next thing I know cases drop significantly. The number of vaccinations skyrocket.. Next, I see my kids being welcomed by a supportive school administration and progressive teachers. Then friendly and curious peers invite my kids to eat with them. The positive visions branch out from there.

There was a time I wouldn’t allow myself to imagine positive scenarios in my head. I mistakenly taught myself only imagining worst case scenarios would prepare and strengthen me for any outcome. I was defensive, angry and quick to judge. That bred monsters of my own making. Monsters that left self inflicted wounds and left some gnarly scars. Scars I now embrace when I find myself afraid and uncertain that I have the strength to fight and protect my kids from those who have nothing better to do than flaunt and abuse their suburban crowns.”

It’s a good thing I didn’t keep my kids out of the loop. As victims of the “Lynch Mom’s” attack themselves, my kids were taught how to set boundaries at young ages. It took tough lessons I had allow them learn, despite how I thought it would kill me. Seeing your kids betrayed, alienated and humiliated sets off a devastating rage. There were times I became so enraged I summoned a thunderstorm and spit fire. The trauma still lingers, but my kids learned that life isn’t about the dishonest Live, Laugh, Love signs the “Lynch Moms” adorn their homes with. It’s truth we should be teaching instead of fundraising for unrealistic anti-bully campaigns.

While the “Lynch Moms” and their kids are a cause for concern life is still moving forward. We are still within the shift that is the death of the old ways in which we lived. We must let go of the now decaying ways of thinking or risk decaying ourselves. Like the death of anything, it’s painful at times and the pain breeds fear. Fear breeds monsters and the nightmares they force us to live in. It’s a good thing the weird, have enough experience within our own darkness (and watching horror movies) to traverse through dreaded realms where the undead seek to steal our light.

As Autumn approaches and we anticipate the harvest of our beloved Halloween traditions, we need to remember we are still in a pandemic. It never left us. It seems we need to be reminded that the ones who fuel our excitement and have the most potent spooky energy are the children. It was our inner child that discovered the love for Halloween and horror movies. It is our nostalgia that fuels our creative endeavors. Our childhood imaginations are the reason why cosplayers can roam the halls at these conventions. We need to take a moment and focus on protecting and giving the the upcoming generations of halloween and horror content creators, filmmakers and artists the chance to imagine, experience and learn their way through the next decade. We need to take a moment and remember they are part of the population that cannot get the vaccine yet and are at risk of contracting the Delta variant and becoming seriously ill. We need to somehow get the “Lynch Moms” to put muzzles on their dangerous and hypocritical mindset and teach their children to mask up and practice social distancing to keep more variants from emerging and prolonging the pandemic. I know from experience masks also protect us from the common grossness that comes from schools anyways. And, if masks are that much of a problem, these moms needs to suck it up, save the White Claws for later and Mom-the-fuck-up. It’s awful to see these bitches fight so hard to get their kids back to school to terrorize and infect teachers. They clearly are projecting how they can’t handle the monsters they bred. The thought of those walk-out’s backfiring and the “Lynch Moms” forced to keep their hellions at home helps me close my eyes, with a smile on my face.

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